I'm trying

Behold, my lunch and afternoon snack for today!

 

It's really time for me to be honest with myself (and the four people who read this blog): a big reason I slacked and pretty much stopped tracking my points is because I didn't like seeing the points values of my favourite bad foods and how quickly they depleted my daily allotment. 

Out of tracking, out of mind, right? Maybe, but definitely not out of hips.

Knowing I need to be better and that I need to try harder - and knowing how crappy I feel (mentally and physically) after junk food - I set out today to start trying. For my lunch, I had turkey on whole wheat bread with lots of veggies and regular mustard (but no cheese - sigh). The salad was chopped veg (no lettuce because, really, why bother?) topped with reduced-fat Italian dressing and bacon bits for crunch. The fruit cup I'm saving for this afternoon when I inevitably crave something sweet. 

When tallied, the sandwich, salad and fruit cup come in at six points.

SIX POINTS.

That's it. I get to eat ALL THAT and it only costs me six points. My coffee this morning was two points so all told, by this afternoon I'll only have used eight points of my allotted 31.

So with 23 points left on the day, it really feels like I have endless choices. Of course, bad food will use up those points pretty quickly so I still have to be mindful. But when I actually stop to think about it, I can eat a lot of god stuff for minimal points so not tracking because I want to have a cheeseburger is a really lousy excuse. 

I'm definitely going to try harder, not just with eating better but with tracking all that I eat, cheeseburgers and salads and donuts and fruit and all of it.

WW Weigh-In #58

In keeping with the weighing-in-on-time-but-posting-late theme, here we go:

Last week: 194.0 lb
This week: 195.2 lb
Total gained: 1.2 lb

Interestingly enough, I gained back exactly what I had lost the week before. That was partly because of the awesome sibling weekend we had with the Beau's siblings and their spouses. Oh, and bowling is not a physical enough activity to work off an amazing dinner at an Italian restaurant, complete with red wine, and followed by dessert at home that included cookies, orange loaf and chocolate brownies with mint icing. (Seriously, why did it take me this long to think of putting mint icing on brownies? Must try peanut butter next.)

I have been doing my best to be active this week too. Wednesday was another big walking day: I spent my day off walking down Runnymede to Bloor (a half hour walk) and then wandered around the bookstore for another hour. Yesterday was a bit harder as we went to see The Tragically Hip; the only activity was some awkward, confined-space dancing but I did do it for almost two hours. Today was more walking and some stretching and exercise band resistance work while watching a movie.

Tomorrow we're off to baby-sit the nephews overnight so some frolicking in the snow will be in order, then we'll see what Sunday brings. Plus it's Family Day weekend so I'm off Monday AND we don't have an issue going out next week so I took Tuesday off too. That means I can get some activity in on those days too!

I'm also going to make a concerted effort to really track my points. I was doing my best when I was banking all my activity points. When I did that, even when I used up all my flex points (and sometimes went into my activity points) I was consistently losing on weeks when I had activity points in the bank. And on those days when it feels like I haven't had nearly enough food to have used up so many points it's nice to see accumulating points mean something good.

There are also some changes coming at work, which I should know more about next week. And these should be good changes too so I'm excited about what's going to be happening and how that will have a positive impact on me.

I also turn 33 next week. Weird.

Tomorrow

My weigh-in tomorrow isn't going to be good, I'm afraid. It's partly because of a weekend at the cottage where I relaxed my eating standards; it's partly because I didn't exercise as much as I should have; and it's partly because of sweets.

My name is Jen and I'm a sweets-o-holic. I have a huge sweet tooth and there's nary a chocolate something I turn down. I'm not into candies and such; rather chocolate bars, cakes and cookies are my weakness.

I've been thinking a lot about this lately and about how I'd be much more successful in my weight loss if I could kick the sweets habit. I would love to be one of those people who could give them up cold turkey and not think about it again. Alas, I'm not. The second I tell myself I'm giving something up, all I do is crave it. It also doesn't help that there's a Tim Horton's in my building. While I'm good about avoiding muffins and bagels for breakfast, it's lunch and coffee time that kill me. I'll go get a chicken wrap (only 5 points!) but cave and get it in a combo with a cookie (7-8 points!). With 30 points a day it's really not worth it yet I do it more than I should.

Dinners at work have been giving me trouble lately too, in that I've been overindulging waaaaaay too much. But because naan is so good, I cave once again.

So I guess it's not just sweets; it's doughy, bready, chewy, floury things that I love. I guess I've always known this and I think that's why I eschewed fruit for so long: I wanted something chewier dammit!

I also keep telling myself that I need to start planning my meals better, even log my points ahead of time, so I know exactly what I'm eating each day. And every time I think about this I find some reason to start...tomorrow. Which, of course, is when I'll give up sweets.

This plateau I've been in? This is why. My inability to change my root behaviours and start consistently making the right choices. And I don't need to start thinking that I'm at my ideal weight because I know I can lose more. I just need to focus on the parts of my behaviour that end up sabotaging my weight loss and figure out how to overcome them.

Don't worry, I'll be sure to share my successes - and failures!

My maturing tastes

When I first started WW, I was a little nervous about what I would snack on that would keep my points down. It was great that most vegetables were zero points, but even better that all fruit were zero points - except that I didn't really like fruit when I started.

Ruh-roh.

Until WW, I was never really a big fruit eater. I had chronic ear infections as a kid so I drank a lot of banana-flavoured medicine; I think that turned me off bananas. And then I find most other fruit too acidic. I've always loved melon but they're high GI foods so when I was trying to eat low-GI I stayed away from them.

That didn't leave much for me to eat.

Lately, though, I've been rediscovering my love of melons (zero points > low GI) and finding that I absolutely love strawberries, blueberries and raspberries. I'd much rather eat a bowl of sliced strawberries than a bowl of chips. Seriously. I'm also quickly becoming fond of pineapple oranges (as long as it's a nice sweet orange - not too acidic).

I'm still not a fan of apples or bananas but my tastes have definitely grown up to embrace delicious fruit that's good for me, in all their zero-point glory.

Confessions of a Weight Watcher: Portions

It's been awhile since I posted a WW confession, probably because I've been an all-around bad Weight Watcher. Sigh. But I'm getting back on track which means I'm discovering more sins to confess.

And I must admit: I suck at portion control. 

When I measure, I'm good. When I eat zero-point foods, I'm good (because I pig out). But when I say, "I'll just have a bit", that bit turns into everything in front of me.

Like today, when I ate 3/4 of a small container of Haagen-Dazs rocky road ice cream - and logged a cool 26 points for my efforts. Was it a delicious 26 points? sure. Was it a worthwhile 26 points? Erm, not really. Will I do it again? There's a chance. I mean, those marshmallow swirls were so good and the chunks of almonds were awesome...

But with only 29 points per day, I can think of better ways to spend them. Like on, you know, the food my body needs to function and stuff.

Oh, Haagen-Dazs, it was nice while it lasted.

Breakfast of champions

For the longest time I didn't eat berries (or much fruit, for that matter). Since starting WW and knowing that all fruit is 0 points, I've become more open to fruity goodness - and it's a good thing. I've discovered I love strawberries, blueberries and raspberries. Lately, I've been on a strawberry/blueberry kick, as evinced by my (slightly blurry) breakfast. 

1 cup spoon-sized Shredded Wheat, 2/3 cup skim milk and liberal handfuls of berries make for a delicious breakfast - all for only 6 points!

My secret weapon

When I first joined WW, I started strong right away and had some great early success. In recent weeks I've seen the scale creep up a bit more than I would like but I'm still doing well and I'm slowly getting myself back on track (now that the turkey-gravy-roast beef-chocolate trap of Easter has passed). Part of that getting back on track is utilizing my secret weapon.

Grapes.

And it's nothing to do with Don Cherry or (alas) wine. Before WW, I wasn't much into fruit. It just ever really appealed to me. Now, though, I've discovered I actually enjoy eating raspberries, blueberries, melon (okay, I always liked melon) and grapes.

I'm not picky on colour - red, green or purple will do just fine; all I ask is that they be seedless. And what the Beau and I have discovered is that if we leave the grapes on the vine in the fridge, we won't eat them. Instead, as soon as I get them home, I pull them off the vine, wash them up and load them into the biggest container we have. Then when we're jonesing for something to munch on while watching TV, instead of bad food, we pull out the grapes. We have eaten a bunch of grapes in a sitting before.

This is particularly helpful because all fruit on WW logs in a zero points. I bring grapes with me to work too, to snack on in the afternoon - or at least I did. I've stopped doing that as much now and it's something I need to pick up again.

When I eat grapes regularly, I feel good, I look good and the scale moves in the right direction. It's win-win-win!

Best secret weapon ever.

WW Weigh-In #15

Oh hi! I can't believe I almost missed posting today! It's actually been a busy day for me: I was working from home this morning, had to take the car in for service this afternoon and then NHL playoffs tonight! It's the first round so there's so many games on - including three tonight. I'm in my own special heaven.

But about the numbers:

Last week: 184.6 lb
This week: 185.0 lb
Total gained this week: 0.4 lb

Weight loss target: 181.8 lb
To reach target: 3.2 lb

A bit of a gain and 1.2 lb gained over the past two weeks. Sigh. I keep reminding myself that, since starting WW, I've lost 17 lb, which is awesome. I just really want to lose that next 15 lb!

I know why I've been slipping: I haven't been as diligent with tracking my points. I've been guessing more than I should and I haven't been measuring my portions as often. I know what I need to do - but sometimes it's the doing that's hard.

But if I want to lose that next 15 lb, I have to do it! 

Back-tracking

Sometimes I go on my own mini eating binges. It's not like I clean out the fridge, but sometimes I just need to eat a lot of hummus and tortilla chips or ice cream or fudge. And I'm usually a little ashamed afterward and I often don't log my points that day.

But I always go back.

My points log is between me and the internet so it's not like people are going to comment on my horrible habits. And I have the extra weekly points to use and I often bank quite a few activity points, so it's okay if I eat a bit more. But most importantly, I'm only cheating myself if I don't accurately track my food.

It's really tempting to think, "Oh, it was just a piece of fudge, it doesn't matter." Thing is, it does. Other thing is, it's okay. And that is what I need to remember.

As long as I honestly track my points I'll be successful. It's really that simple. So my little binge from last night that I haven't logged yet? I'm going to do that now.

(And I'm only blushing a little.)

WW Weigh-in #9

I've been eating dangerously the past little while. I have still logged everything but I've been burning through my weekly points faster than I'd like. I know that I'm supposed to use them up so that's not the problem; it's that I'm using them up on Aero mint chocolate bars and an extra helping of naan bread and red wine. And yes, it's okay to use my extra points for treats like these, but I'm having them far more often than one would have treats. I'm also not eating as many fruits and vegetables as I was when I first joined Weight Watchers so there are some little changes to my eating habits that I need to make. On the plus side, I've been rocking a pair of jeans that didn't fit me a month ago and every time I wear them I get compliments. (It's hard not to wear them ALL THE TIME.)

Despite my dangerous eating, I did manage a loss, albeit a small one:

Last week: 189.0 lb
This week: 188.8 lb
Total lost this week: 0.2 lb
Total lost with WW: 13.2 lb

Weight loss target: 181.8 lb
To reach target: 7.0 lb

If I can get back into my healthy eating habits I'm confident I can hit my next goal by Easter. And then I will have lost 20 lbs. I can hardly even comprehend that number. I want this so badly!

My week of gluttony

I turned 32 yesterday - yay me! Of course, that means both Valentine's Day and my birthday fell in the same WW week. (While my WW week goes Wednesday - Tuesday and Valentine's Day was last Tuesday, because of my long work hours, the Beau and I celebrated V-Day on Wednesday.)

At first I wasn't going to log points, mostly because I was scared, but also because I wanted to enjoy myself without feeling too guilty. But the Beau said I should log everything I ate just to know how it would total up and to see how bad it really was. So I did. And did I ever eat my way through my points!

Valentine's Day dinner was actually pretty good; I managed to stay within my points total for the day. Since my last weigh-in, I've been at 30 daily points but I still have my 49 extra weekly points. By Friday, I started dipping into those weekly points. By Monday night, I had not only consumed all my extra weekly points but 15 of 20 accumulated activity points.

At least I can say this: they were delicious, delicious points.

So what did I consume over the week? Well...

Roasted pork tenderloin; cookies 'n cream ice cream; pizza; beer; poached eggs on crab cakes with jerk mayo; onion rings; chai latte; chicken burrito; beef nachos; peanut butter on toast; grilled calamari and tiger shrimp; red wine; penne in a rose sauce with smoked chicken and artichokes; dark chocolate truffle cake; pad thai; basil fried rice; red curry; yellow curry; and mixed Thai vegetables.

Needless to say, a delicious week.

The real measure, though, will come tomorrow when I hop on the scale. My goal is to at least be the same as last week - 190.0 lb. I'll be okay if I don't lose; I just really don't want to gain.

But even if I do gain, I wouldn't change anything. It's been an awesome week and I'm getting myself back on track now. Though I would love another slice of that truffle cake...

All I want to do is eat

And I've already used up all my points for today. And I've used up five of my weekly points. And I'm still hungry. And I didn't even have a workout today.

How strong can I be?

Three weeks in

Tomorrow is my fourth WW weigh-in but marks three full weeks that I've been on the program. So far, I've had great success, logging losses at each weigh-in. Last week I was a little nervous that a weekend of indulging would throw me off my progress, but I prevailed and still lost.

I'm not so optimistic about tomorrow.

I had another great Saturday night this past weekend and did a significant amount of damage to my points totals. As it stands tonight, I've burned through my extra 49 weekly points an dipped into my activity points, using seven of the 17 I've earned. I know this is what you're supposed to do, that it's okay to use up the points because you can't carry them over and it helps keep you from feeling deprived. Well, I certainly haven't felt deprived this week!

So I'm going into tomorrow with trepidation and I don't know what would be worse: gaining, losing or staying pat. Why would losing be bad? Because that would help emphasize that my indulging is okay, that I can do it and still lose weight. And this would be bad because it would feel like I'm reverting to old habits and that it's far too early in the program to do that. Gaining would be bad because, well, it's gaining. Staying pat would be the least bad of the three; at least I wouldn't have undone any of my progress!

I'll be honest, I'm still struggling with my food relationships. I want to eat when I'm not hungry, but because I'm bored. I'm trying to keep my fruit and veggie intake high but I'm starting to get tired of it. I also have problems listening to my body for "I'm full!" cues; I love food and I love to keep eating delicious things even when I'm more than satiated.

But it's only been three weeks and these are the things that Weight Watchers will help me with (right?). I've said before I'm not the most patient person so there's a part of me that wants to be 30 lb lighter NOW because haven't I eaten enough salad yet? I just have to keep reminding myself that I'll get there, that baby steps are where it's at, and that I'm in this with my body, not against it.

Confessions of a Weight Watcher: Peanut Butter

I could easily eat my daily points allotment in peanut butter, any day of the week. And some days, it's really tempting.

Tomorrow's weigh-in

Weigh-in tomorrow could be scary. See, this past weekend the Beau and I got together with his siblings and their partners and we had a fabulous dinner party. And by fabulous I mean artichoke dip with tortilla chips; baked brie with crusty bread; bacon-wrapped, cornbread-stuffed Cornish hens; homemade mushroom risotto; Caesar salad with amazing homemade dressing; and a few bottle of delicious red wine. Understandably we were too full for a chocolate and caramel fondue. Next morning, however, we were able to have eggs Benedict with bacon (two kinds!) and mimosas.

It was a great time and I didn't count points at all on Saturday or Sunday. I got back on track Monday and Tuesday but I'm pretty sure I maxed out all my bonus points (and then some) on Saturday night, so my tracking on Monday and Tuesday won't exactly be accurate. But that's okay. Saturday was such a lovely evening that it was worth burning through too many points. And it's not something I'll be doing every weekend either, so there's nothing wrong with indulging now and then.

Confessions of a Weigh Watcher: I almost cheated already

Yup. Here I am, in my second full week, and I almost cheated.

In the winter I love me some hot chocolate and at home, we usually get the light stuff and a mug comes in at 2 points, which is just fine and makes for a nice chocolatey dessert. Today, though, I was craving one and went to Tim Horton's. After getting one, I discovered that a medium Tim's hot chocolate clocks in at 6 points! SIX POINTS! With only 13 points left for dinner, I wanted to just ignore this. I mean, it's just hot chocolate, right?

Thing is, it's only myself I'm hurting. And yes I have my extra points but I'm going to a dinner party this weekend where I don't want to have to be too careful and I didn't want to use up many extra points before that. In the end, though, I logged that hot chocolate. I wanted it, I drank it and I have to account for it.

And it was so good too...but I think I'll be avoiding them in the future, at least from Tim Horton's.

Party hearty

Last night was my BFF's birthday party and my first real test since starting Weigh Watchers. I went into the soiree with 13 points left in my daily allotment but I knew those wouldn't last long. Before going, I checked into the points values of white wine, as that's what I'd planned to drink. The result: 5 points for a 5 oz pour. And I had two glasses, so those 10 points pretty much wiped out my remaining allotment.

Over the course of the evening, I consumed a lot of veggies (hurrah broccoli, carrots and edamame!) but I also indulged in some cheese, a few crackers with prosciutto, some hummus and spinach dip for the veggies, a couple of shrimp and, of course, birthday cake. The grand total? 41 points of party fun (including the 10 points on wine).

My grand total on the day was 60, almost double my daily allotment and I burned through 28 of my weekly bonus points. I'm not beating myself up or anything as this is a learning experience (and also the reason for those extra weekly points). But it's helped me realize just how bad my choices were before. I always knew wine was loaded with sugar but thought that a couple of glasses couldn't be that bad. And birthday cake - 9 points! - wasn't something I ate regularly but it was something I didn't exactly restrain myself from when the opportunity presented itself. I also learned that 2 oz of brie rings in at a hefty 5 points. That's lotsa points for a wee bit o' cheese.

Of course I don't want to spend every party eating only the carrot sticks but fortunately my social calendar just busy enough to allow me to save my weekly points for indulgences. And if I go over, so what? I do want to lose weight and I'm serious about it but not to the point where I stop having fun. It will be hard to give up cheese but I can cut back on that; and I can easily cut down how much alcohol I drink. But I'm still going to have fun!

This coming weekend presents the next challenge: dinner with the Beau's siblings/siblings-in-law which will include baked brie; cornish hens; cornbread stuffing; a chocolate fondue; and ample wine. Again, I'll make the best choices I can but I won't let those points stop me from enjoying the evening.

I'll just have to add another workout or two!

Confessions of a Weight Watcher: Point!

As you know I signed up for Weight Watchers on Monday and set Wednesday as my weigh-in day. That means Wednesday is the start of a new week and since I signed up Monday afternoon, I really only had one day of points for "last week", which was yesterday.

I have a daily points allotment of 32, with 49 extra weekly points. At first that felt like a lot...until I logged a day's worth of points and came in at - wait for it - 55. 

 That's right, I burned through 55 points in my first day! I mean, it's only 23 more than my daily allotment.  Only.

Needless to say, yesterday was a great learning experience for me and I'm a little relieved I got to reset today.