Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #36

Yes it's Monday. Yes I'm finally posting about my weigh-in last Wednesday. But I have good reason for being late: I doubted the accuracy of my scale and had to figure out how to test it. The solution presented itself over the weekend, as I started my Christmas baking and a key part of baking is flour. So while shopping for ingredients I picked up an 11 lb bag of flour - which turned out to be the perfect thing to test my scale, as I know exactly how much it weighs.

Boo-yah!

I had convinced myself my scale was off and felt rather smug when putting the bag of flour on said scale. And the reading? 

11 pounds.  Which is how much the bag of flour weighs. Which means my scale works just fine. Which means my weight is what it say it is. Which is rather shitty.

So...the weigh-in:

Last week: 196.4 lb
This week: 196.4 lb

Okay, no change is better than gaining.  I'll go with that.  Still, I'd like to get that last 6.4 lb off before January 1. (Actually, I'd like to get 6.5 lb off so the scale reads less than 190 lb. Yup, I'm so splitting hairs on this.)

So there you have it. My scale works, my weight isn't dropping (but also not climbing) and I baked all weekend.  Though I did learn something while baking: if you ever want to know how bad a dessert is, just make it from scratch. I'm looking at you, pecan pie with 1 cup of corn syrup.

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #35 and Goals Update

Hi guys!  Remember me?  That tardy blogger?  Yeah.  I started this post Thursday at work and I'm finally posting it Friday.  Yeesh.

I haven't been ignoring my blogging duties on purpose, it's just that life got in the way - but it's been good.  I haven't talked much about my happy health of late and that's still important to me and an important part of overall health.  The reason I haven't been talking about it is because I'm in such a good place, happy-wise.  Despite some previous setbacks and a rough day here and there, I've been super happy.  It likely has to do with the Christmas season because I LOVE this time of year but I'm also at a good place in my life.  To be cliche, things are falling (and have fallen) into place.  And it's grand.

But that doesn't mean I don't still have goals or that I'm not getting on the scale.  Since I skipped blogging about my weigh-in last week (but I did weigh in), let's start there:

Two weeks ago: forgot to weigh in
Last week: 196.6 lb
This week 196.4 lb (-0.2 lb)

I've decided I need a new scale.  It's digital and when I turn it on it automatically shows 4 lb, even though no one and nothing is on it.  I reset it after this of course, but I'm always wondering if it's phantomly adding 4 lb.  So I'm going to buy a new one.  Take THAT, scale!

(And for the record, not thrilled with this number but I feel good and think I look pretty good, so I'm not going to stress too much).

So how goes everything else?  Let's see:

Goal:Run - I'm slowly getting back into running regularly but I'm stalling out at about 3 km.  I also need to get a refill on my Ventalin inhaler so I can continue to breathe.  Once I do this I should be able to get my distance back up there.  Lately I've been running out of breath before I run out of energy.

Goal:Food - Work has been so busy of late that I've completely fallen off doing this.  I need to get back into it because I know I do well for most of the day but fall apart in the evenings (usually evenings spent at work when all there is to snack on is Tim Horton's and vending machines and chocolates. Note to self: bring more snacks to work.)

Goal:Weight - So I'm pretty much not going to hit 170 lb by the end of the year.  Right now, I just want to be below 190 lb.  I think if I can keep up the workouts (and running) and really pay attention to what I eat I can actually lose this weight during the Christmas season.  Yeah!

Goal:Pants - I meant to take a picture on Thursday night of how my jeans are fitting but I ran out of time.  After December 13 my life gets much calmer, so I'll check it out then.

Goal:Dress - See above.

Goal:Debt - I currently owe $6,725.44 ($5416.01 + $1,309.43).  I racked up huge amounts of overtime but unfortunately it wasn't logged in time to be added to my next paycheque (which I get tomorrow).  So it's two more weeks before my 30+ hours (!) of overtime are added, but when it does come it will be a nice amount to add to my loans.  I'm close...so close!  The other upside is that I'm done all my Christmas shopping so any extra cash that comes my way will be able to go on loans.  Even if my scale number isn't going down, this number is and I'm so proud of that!

So that's where I stand with 22 days left in this year.  What will I be able to cross off this list in the next three weeks?  I'll let you know!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #34

As seems to be the routine of late, I weigh myself on Wednesdays but don't update here until a few days later.  And it was a bittersweet weigh-in, that's for sure.

Last week: 196.6 lb
This week: 193.6 lb

Sweet because I'm down 3 lb but bitter because I'm still annoyed I have to lose that extra 6 lb that I put on over a weekend (apparently).  Still, the number is going the right way this week and that's what matters. 

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #33

Okay, I had an indulgent weekend.  It was the Beau's birthday last Friday and we went all-out with the food and drink.  So I was expecting a bit of a gain, but I wasn't ready for this:

Last week: 192.0
This week: 196.6

Seriously!?  I gained 4.6 lb!?  NOT IMPRESSED with this.  I also didn't believe my scale and got on it a few times.  I'm also getting on it again tomorrow because this just feels wrong. 

Also, I went grocery shopping today and have a fridge full of grapes, cucumbers, carrots, kale, red peppers, apples, oranges, green beans and Greek yogurt (which I've discovered I love).  Next week's weigh-in will be MUCH better!

Oh, and I started with Relora on Sunday night and I can definitely say I'm sleeping better.  I also feel more relaxed but I'm not sure if that's the supplements or my brain having placebo effect.  Still, I'm happy with how it's going - even though it's only been three days. 

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #31

You know how I was dreading getting on the scale this morning?  Part of me wanted to skip it, to just say I'm sick and didn't feel like it, but that's too much of a cop-out.

So I got on the scale, all nervous - and the results:

Last week: 192.4 lb
This week: 192.0 lb

Down 0.4 lb!  Despite all that awful food I ate, I still lost almost half a pound.  So I'm still going down but I realized something this morning: I've only got two months left to hit my goal weight of 170 lb and losing half a pound a week won't get me there.

This led me to ask myself, do I reset my year-end target weight or do I go hardcore to drop the 22 lb?  It's tempting to try some lose-weight-fast solution to get down to my goal but I know I won't be able to sustain any kind of plan like that and it's not worth hitting 170 lb only to gain a bunch of weight back.  But I also don't want to short-change myself by changing my goal weight, because that's where I want to be and even if I don't get there by December 31 I still want to get there.

So I'm going to stand pat with my target and just keep working.

I've been toying with the idea of joining Weight Watchers online for awhile now; I know some women who have used/are using this program to great success and I have no doubt it would work for me.  The thing is, I feel guilty spending money on this when I still have debts to pay off.  My current weight isn't causing me any health-related problems, nor is it keeping me from doing anything I want to do (I'm still running!), so losing weight is for me, not for any other reason.  I was planning to join Weight Watchers once my debt was gone, but maybe I should look at the numbers again.

And with all the overtime I put in last week, I'll have a nice paycheque soon and that will help the debt.  Surely I can find the money for Weight Watchers?

I'll let you know what I work out.

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #30

I weighed myself yesterday, I really did.  I then went to work and worked for 14 hours and had no time to blog and was too exhausted when I got home to think of anything other than sleep - and that is why you're getting my weight update (updeight?) now.

Last week: 192.4 lb
This week: 192.4 lb

I think this is the first time ever there has been no change in my weight.  This is good because it didn't go up but I'd still prefer if it went down.  C'est la vie.

I've read in countless places that stress contributes to weight gain, as stress triggers the production of cortisol, which encourages the body to store fat.  And as I posted earlier, I'm a great big stress ball.  I worry about stuff I said and did in high school.  HIGH SCHOOL.  I know I'm insane and I know I need to work on it but I just don't have the time or - apparently - the willingness to seek any kind of help. 

I know that exercise helps relieve stress and it does help me, but I can't go off for a run every time something stressful pops up - and that can be very often in my life (mostly because I make stress mountains out of stress molehills).  Eating right and sleeping right also help, and I do my best with this, but it doesn't always work.  Though I recently came across an article in Chatelaine, extolling the virtues of Relora to help relieve stress and reduce cortisol levels.  Since seeing this I've wanted to pick some up and see if it helps - but I haven't gotten my lazy butt around to it yet.

Finding Relora is going to be my next goal.  That and cutting back on my fibre.  I've been eating Bran Flakes all week and I've been all bloated and gassy and gross.  Blech.  Guess I'll have to stick to fruit and veg - it's such a hard life!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #28

I was dreading getting on the scale today.  After my near success last week at cracking 190 lb, I was a little anxious to see what I'd weigh in at this week.  So...

Last week: 190.1 lb
This week: 193.6 lb

EFF.  How did I manage to gain 3.5 lb in a week?!?!  I didn't eat all that badly.  I mean, I had a huge brownie with chocolate ganache and ice cream; short ribs poutine; a turkey burger and sweet potato fries from Hero Burger; about four servings worth of pasta; a plateful of Chinese food; a plateful of Indian food; and maybe an apple fritter. 

Oh.  That may have done it. 

My self-sabotaging strikes again!  I'm pretty disappointed with myself but it's a much-needed wake-up call.  I can't take even a 0.1 lb loss for granted; I need to stick with this and keep going and be positive and make the right choices. 

And I just need to make sure I lose 4 lb this week, right?  Right!  (Yeesh.)

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #27

Wow, have I really been at this for 27 weeks?  I guess longer than that, since I took the month of July off from the scale. 

So how am I doing after 27 weeks?  Well...

Last week: 191.0 lb
This week: 190.2 lb

The good news is that it's a loss.  The bad news is that I'm 0.3 lb away from breaking the 190 lb barrier.  ARGH! 

But - BUT - check this out: when I started my weight loss challenge, I weighed in at 200.2 lb.  I've now officially lost 10 lb.  It's only taken me eight months to get this far, but still - 10 lb down! 

Of course it seems daunting to think I can lose 20 lb in the next three months but I'm going to keep at it.  I would love to see the number on the scale drop faster but one important thing I've been learning while trying to lose weight is that I'm only going to be able to maintain my success if I make changes that work with my lifestyle.  And that's the big thing, isn't it?  It's more important for me to be able to maintain my weight and even keep the scale inching down than it is for me to lose huge amounts of weight in a short period of time. 

I'd still like to be at 170 lb on New Year's Eve, but it's okay if I'm not because I'm doing things in my life that I can keep doing, whether it's making the right food choices, fitting in regular exercise, watching my portions or even cutting sugar out of my coffee (which has been a challenge, let me tell you). 

So let's see what the next three months bring!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #26

Let's get right to it:

Last week: 191.6 lb
This week: 191.0 lb

That's a loss of 0.6 lb, which is the right direction but I'm still not doing what I need to do.  And we're halfway through September, meaning I've got just over three months to lose 21 lb.  It's time to make the hardest decision I think I've ever had to make:

No.  More.  Sweets.

I'm pretty sure that's what's doing me in.  I've got a sweet tooth and a HUGE weakness for chocolate and cookies, particularly together.  (There's a reason I don't make chocolate chip cookies at home anymore.  I eat way too many of them.)

Other than sweets, I know I'm making better choices than I used to and I'm making an effort to really watch my portion sizes. 

I'm also going to try to get used to drinking my coffee without sugar.  This is going to be a challenge, for sure, but I'd like to do this for a week and see what the results are like.  Because I REALLY want to be below 190 lb next week!

Well sugar, it's been nice knowing you...

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #25

I'll admit, I was a little nervous to get on the scale this morning, after my ice cream binge on Sunday and some other bad choices this past week.  But I manned up and got on that scale anyways and the results?

Last week: 191.8 lb
This week: 191.6 lb

0.2 lb down.  Makes me wonder what I might have done had it not been for that delicious, delicious rocky road ice cream.  Though I'm now 1.7 lb away from finally breaking the 190 lb barrier and I really want to get past that.  So for the next week, I'm going to really pay attention to what I'm eating and make sure I fit in my workouts. 

I can do this!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #23

Okay, I'm finally back!

It has been quite the week, that's for sure.  While I love long weekends, it means we lose a day of production on the magazine so I've been pulling longer hours and I'll be working on Monday as well.  BOO.  But I've got other fun things planned for the weekend so that will help make up for it.

One thing I did make time for this week was to weigh in.  It has been two weeks since my last weigh-in and it would have been nice to be down a few pounds, but I did spend one of those weeks in Halifax, eating every bit of seafood I could find, including amazing lobster chowder, a lobster roll and a full lobster dinner (it wasn't all lobster though - I also found time to eat fish & chips, pan-seared haddock and caramelized scallops.  YUM.)

Pre-vacation weight: 192.2 lb
Post-vacation weight: 192.4 lb

You know, a 0.2 lb weight gain is something I can live with.  I wouldn't be surprised if that extra weight was because of him:

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #22

If there's one thing I've learned about myself while trying to lose weight, it's that I have trouble keeping the losing momentum going.  Last week, I was down 4 lb; this week, well....

192.2 lb

So it's four steps forward, one step back.  I really am good at this yo-yo-ing thing.  But on the bright side, it's two weeks now that I've kept 3 lb off, so that's good.

I also can't seem to quiet this voice in the back of my head saying, "Maybe 190-ish lb is where you should be."  I'm not going to throw in the towel yet though; I've still got 4 1/2 months left in the year to see where I can be.  And I've got about six weeks to hit my first goal of being 180 lb at the end of September.  So 3 lb over two weeks actually isn't the worst pace to be on.  If I keep that up, I'll hit my goal right on time!

--------------------
Plank-a-day: 15/17 (and still at 30 seconds)

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #21

I got back on the scale today and I was a little worried; I've eaten terribly the last two days (and by terribly I mean terrible for me yet oh so delicious) and I was worried this would be reflected in my weight.

But I hopped on anyways and saw....191.2 lb.  That's a 4 lb loss!  Wowza!

I've been sticking with my workouts but I really think the food journal is helping me.  There have been a few times when I've made better choices because I didn't want to have to write my awful choices down.  Even though no one else reads my food journal, once it's down on paper it's there to stare back at me and I don't like that kind of guilt.  And after such a successful weigh-in, I want to keep it going!

--------
Plank-a-day: 9/10

Back at it

Today is August 1, meaning I'm back on the scale.  I made sure I hopped on before eating, just because I wanted to, you know, be as light as possible.  I'll admit, there was a part of me hoping to see the number come in below 190, as a kind of reward for staying away from the scale for a week and just focusing on exercise and trying to make good eating choices.

Alas, 'twas not to be: I weighed in at 195.2 lb. 

Yes, I'm not thrilled with this number but I can tell I'm getting slimmer: my clothes fit better; I'm liking my reflection more; and I've recently purchased a few items of clothing (two pairs of shorts and a pair of pants) in beautiful size 12.  I'm wondering if part of the weight gain is due to me increasing my muscle mass, but since I haven't weighed myself for a month I can't be sure.

I'm going to restart my Up-Down Challenge with my next official weigh-in on Wednesday August 10 and I'm still going to reward myself with a book; increasing my book ownership is going to be the "up" part of the challenge.  But since I'm doing the Canadian Book Challenge, I'll be getting books for that as well, so every time I lose 5 lb, I'm buying a book for myself. 

Once again, I find myself aiming for 190.2 lb so that's my short-term goal.  Here's a list of where I want to be and when:

By September 30,  I would like to weigh 180 lb.
By November 30, I would like to weigh 170 lb.
By December 31, I would like to still weigh 170 lb.

I'll be really happy if I can hit 170 lb and maintain that weight, especially during the delicious Christmas season.  And 170 lb feels like it's a good weight for me to aim for, because I should be able to achieve it and because I think it's a good weight for my body type.

I've also got some other goals, which I'll outline this coming week.  It's been nice being off the scale for a month, but it does help motivate me so I can't stay away.  But to help alleviate the disappointment I feel when the scale doesn't go down as much as I'd like (or when it goes up) I'm going to have other things to use as a way to measure my progress.  Because sometimes progress can't be gauged by a simple number on a simple scale.

Even with all this planned in my mind, I still wanted to take advantage of the holiday Monday so I made the Beau and I a delicious brunch:

Homemade crepes topped with fresh blueberry sauce, Phoenician yogurt with cinnamon, peameal bacon and orange slices.  YUM!

(Oh, and I'll get back on the loan updates starting August 10 as well!)

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #20 - and a hiatus

Because of my crappy mood yesterday, I delayed the weigh-in until this morning.  The result: 193.2 lb.  It's a loss this week, but not much; I'm down 0.4 lb.  But a loss is a loss and I'll take it.

I've also decided (just this morning, actually) that I'm taking July off from the scale.  I've become so caught up in the number that I'm beginning to dread it and I'm basing way too much of my self-worth on that digital output.  I'm not taking a break from being healthy though; I'm going to continue to work out and do my best to eat right and just relax for a month and see where that gets me. 

I've also been thinking about Weight Watchers again.  I contemplated it before but I wimped out - I'm so afraid of failure in a group setting that I just couldn't do it.  But I think it might be time to reevaluate how I feel about it and give it a shot.  With my work schedule, though, it might be tough for me to get to meetings so I might try the online program first.  I'm not going to do much before the fall, but come September, I want to have a plan in place.

And that's just it - I need a plan and I need to give myself time.  Sure, I'm not where I thought I'd be weight-wise but I'm making better changes in my lifestyle and that's a good thing.  I'm working out more, I'm eating better, I'm getting my finances in good standing and, even if I'm not getting the medical answers I want, at least I'm getting answers.  All in all, the first six months of 2011 have been pretty good to me. 

Since it's the long weekend, the Beau and I are looking to get to the cottage for a few days, which will be just what I need.  I was also recently in Parry Sound for a few days, which was a lovely break (even though I spent it redoing a bedroom at my mom's house - hard work!).  A break is definitely going to be good for me - I need to stop evaluating myself on some number and start looking at all the wonderful things I have in my life and find my happiness there.

I still want to get my weight down to 170 lb and I'd like to be at 180 lb by the end of the summer.  But for now, I'm going to enjoy the summer with those I care about (my kitty is on my lap as I type this, which makes for an interesting set-up) and just relax. 

The Beau loves me the way I am so maybe I should spend some time doing the same.  Who knows where that attitude will take me?!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #19 and dinner tonight

Golden delicious polenta

We didn't publish an issue of the magazine last night, so I went to work today.  Because of that, the Beau took on dinner-making duties tonight and made an amazing dinner of polenta topped with a spicy chicken and mushroom tomato sauce - so good!  Polenta is one of our favourite carb substitutes; we buy it by the tube, slice it into thick disks and roast it in the oven so it's crisp on the outside but soft on the inside.  Polenta is made of cornmeal so it's not white-flour heavy like pasta or bread, but it's still delicious and really filling.  We've also started buying dried mushrooms because we both love mushrooms but can never cook the fresh ones quickly enough.  The dried mushrooms work really well in a sauce and added a nice touch to tonight's dinner.

But on to the weigh-in.  I didn't make it to the gym today, not because I didn't want to go but because it was so busy at work today that I didn't even get a break.  I probably could have stayed a bit later than I did, but not getting a lunch break meant after-work errands and I wanted to get home in good time.  Though I think a break from the gym was good for me; my muscles are a bit sore from weights yesterday and my shins were a bit achy (I've been stretching a lot because I really want to keep my running up!).

Tonight, the scale looked up at me and said 193.6 lb.  That's 0.8 lb down from last week (yay!) but still not the 190.2 lb that will get me a book (boo).  It's also not where I wanted to be but at least the number is going the right way. 

I know I can do this and I have to really work at not getting frustrated.  I also have to really work at making better choices and - this is most important - watching my portion sizes.  I've mentioned this before and I'm still not doing what I need to do.  But I am getting more vegetables and I've actually discovered I enjoy some fruit! 

So I'll keep trying. 

(Hm...can I blame the not-much weight loss on weight gain due to muscle gain?  Somehow I think that's wishful thinking!)

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #16

As promised I weighed myself today and...

192.2 lb - that's a loss of 1.8 lb!

Sure I've been gaining and losing the same couple of pounds for about a month now, but this still feels good.

And I've come to the realization that saving money for every pound lost is not really working, mostly because I want to pay down my student loans and I'm putting all my extra money there.  But the other thing is that I feel I need a more immediate reward for losing.  So...here's my new thing:

For every two pounds lost, I get a new book. 

This is a big deal, as I'm a huge reader and I've got a massive list in my Kobo library of books to buy.  The unfortunate thing is that, this week, no book; I've only lost 1.8 lb.  But to keep this working for me, I'm going to let my losses be accumulative. 

So if I start this amendment of my challenge at 192.2 lb, then once I reach 190.2 lb, I get a book.  If it takes me eight weeks to do so, well then it takes me eight weeks.  If I gain?  Then I have to get back to 192.2 (or less) before I can start counting any loss towards the 2lb requirement. 

I'm thinking this will work for me because, man, I love me a book!  In the meantime, I'm going to sleep well tonight knowing I'm that much lighter. 

Yay!

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #15

And...I'm back up again: 194.0 lb.  Just when it seems like I might be closing in on that 189 lb mark, up I go.  Bah.

I've got to get back into my groove again, the one that saw me dropping five pounds in the first couple of weeks I tried this.  I think part of the problem this past week is that I've been off; when I'm at home, I eat like crap.  When I'm at work, I have healthier snacks, better lunches and definitely drink more water. 

Since I don't want to stop taking time off work, I really need to improve my eating habits when at home.  I've been contemplating keeping a food diary, but I'm scared what it will show me and I'd be too embarrassed to share...which means it might be a good tool.  Maybe I'll eat fewer bad things if I write them down. 

I should also dust off that pedometer I bought waaaaay back when and start using the kitchen scale I bought waaaaaay back when.  I really want to feel good about myself in a bathing suit this year and cottage season in pretty much here.  I've got to work harder, dammit.

(Same old tune, I know.  I'm more than a little disappointed in myself.)

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #14

Weighed myself tonight and the result?

192.4 lb.  That's a loss of 1.2 lb since my last weigh-in.  I'm not quite going to hit my goal of being below 190 by the long weekend, but I really want to start June at 189 lb.

It's strange, but when I started this, I assumed I'd have reached my goal by now and would be prancing around in new clothes that showed off my slimmer figure.  I'm learning that it's a lot harder than I thought to not just lose weight but consistently lose weight and maintain that weight loss.  I've tried to approach this as making a lifestyle change and I've been doing that (for better or worse) but I'm also wondering if this is as low as I can go.  And that depresses me.

I want to be 170 lb.  I've got 22.4 lb to go.  I've only been able to get down about 8 lb since I started this 14 WEEKS ago.  Am I fooling myself thinking I can lose this much weight?  Or am I just being lazy?

I plan to find out.

Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #13

I did weigh myself last night, I promise.  I just didn't have time to post about it. 

The result?  193.6 lb - down 0.4 lb.  I must say, I'm getting frustrated with myself that I'm not seeing better results but I know it's because I'm eating food that is terrible for me.  So I'm giving myself a mini-goal: I want to be under 190 lb by the long weekend; that's just about two weeks to get down 3.6 lb.  I know I can do this because I've lost more weight than that in two weeks before. 

I know I can do this.