I woke up this morning all excited it was Friday and realized - I didn't get on the scale on Wednesday. I didn't even think about getting on the scale. In fact, I barely even noticed I missed my weekly weigh-in.
Why? It's been a nutsy week at work. We finished a regular issue on Tuesday and we're currently working on our Newsmakers issue, which goes to the printer today so we've done two magazines in a week, which is not the norm. Hence my life not being any kind of norm. Though I have managed to get home most nights this week before the Beau went to bed, which is always nice. There have been work weeks where I haven't seen him awake for three days at a time.
But back to the weigh-in: I'm just going to let it go and get back on track next week. After all, why stress about that kind of thing? The world will not end if I don't get on a scale.
Happy Friday everyone!
Showing posts with label new job. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new job. Show all posts
Friday, November 25, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Tell me why I don't like Mondays
We're entering a really busy time at work and the first busy season I've experienced since starting my new job and I'm terrified. By this time next Friday, we will have put out about 200 pages of editorial material and over 300 magazine pages in two issues. It's a lot of volume and I've got to know what's happening with each edit page each step of the way and make sure they all get done on time.
And I'm freaking out.
I've spent all weekend stressing about it. I worked 13 hours on Friday and I'm looking at at least that pretty much every day this coming week. I'm not complaining about the hours (I used to waitress so long hours are old hat to me) but I'm so worried about getting it all done and not screwing something up. I'm so worried about getting in trouble from my manager for not doing the right thing. I'm so worried about not knowing the right answer when asked.
Even as I'm sitting here typing this I'm fighting a panic attack. I'm actually thinking I'd rather be outrunning zombies in The Walking Dead, which the Beau is currently watching.
I've even been thinking about looking for a new job. I haven't even been in my current role for a year and I already want out. Want to know why? Because I'm scared and I don't always know what I'm doing and I hate that. I want to be an expert and I want to be an expert now. I know I have lots to learn and I know I'm in a tough job but I want to feel like I'm in control and that I know how to do it and I don't feel that way.
But since I need to work I'll swallow my fear and get up each day and go in and do the best I can and keep hoping that it all works out in the end. And maybe after this next week, when things are over and have worked out, I'll feel a bit better about myself.
Just five more days.
And I'm freaking out.
I've spent all weekend stressing about it. I worked 13 hours on Friday and I'm looking at at least that pretty much every day this coming week. I'm not complaining about the hours (I used to waitress so long hours are old hat to me) but I'm so worried about getting it all done and not screwing something up. I'm so worried about getting in trouble from my manager for not doing the right thing. I'm so worried about not knowing the right answer when asked.
Even as I'm sitting here typing this I'm fighting a panic attack. I'm actually thinking I'd rather be outrunning zombies in The Walking Dead, which the Beau is currently watching.
 |
| I'd rather face this than next week at work. |
I've even been thinking about looking for a new job. I haven't even been in my current role for a year and I already want out. Want to know why? Because I'm scared and I don't always know what I'm doing and I hate that. I want to be an expert and I want to be an expert now. I know I have lots to learn and I know I'm in a tough job but I want to feel like I'm in control and that I know how to do it and I don't feel that way.
But since I need to work I'll swallow my fear and get up each day and go in and do the best I can and keep hoping that it all works out in the end. And maybe after this next week, when things are over and have worked out, I'll feel a bit better about myself.
Just five more days.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Why Wednesdays rock
I don't work on Wednesdays. I know, I know, you're all jealous and stuff. But before you get too mad at me, I'll explain why I don't work on Wednesdays.
Tuesday is when we send Maclean's to the printer. Our printer deadline is late. LATE. This means I start work at noon on Tuesdays but stay until the wee hours - sometimes as late at 3:00 a.m. Because of this, I don't go into work on Wednesdays. My work week hour total is much the same as anyone else: 36.25 hours (7.25 hours/day). But I regularly log 40+ hours in the four days a week I work - which is another reason I get Wednesdays off.
I'm not trying to make myself sound hard-done-by, merely explaining why I get this beautiful mid-week break.
Having Wednesdays off is kind of awesome. I sleep in (mostly out of necessity - when I go to bed at 3 or 4 in the morning, there's no 8 am wake-up call) but I also strive to get a lot done; I really want to tackle as much housework as I can and even do the grocery shopping so my weekends get freed up. And with free weekends, the Beau and I can spend some quality time together.
That is probably the worst part about my erratic, late-night hours: less time with my man. We used to eat dinner together every night; now it's hit and miss, depending on when I get home, if I want a workout, how hungry he is, all these things. To help alleviate a little of this, we come back to Wednesdays and the biggest reason they rock: I make a nice dinner and we sit down together and enjoy some "us" time.
Often, it's just chilling in front of the TV, chatting about random things, but that's the kind of stuff that makes our relationship work so well - we can completely relax with one another and just enjoy being lazy together.
Tonight I'm making pork chops with a curry-apple sauce, roasted asparagus and basmati rice. I picked up a sample pack of beer today and we're going to have a lovely evening.
This is why Wednesdays rock.
Tuesday is when we send Maclean's to the printer. Our printer deadline is late. LATE. This means I start work at noon on Tuesdays but stay until the wee hours - sometimes as late at 3:00 a.m. Because of this, I don't go into work on Wednesdays. My work week hour total is much the same as anyone else: 36.25 hours (7.25 hours/day). But I regularly log 40+ hours in the four days a week I work - which is another reason I get Wednesdays off.
I'm not trying to make myself sound hard-done-by, merely explaining why I get this beautiful mid-week break.
Having Wednesdays off is kind of awesome. I sleep in (mostly out of necessity - when I go to bed at 3 or 4 in the morning, there's no 8 am wake-up call) but I also strive to get a lot done; I really want to tackle as much housework as I can and even do the grocery shopping so my weekends get freed up. And with free weekends, the Beau and I can spend some quality time together.
That is probably the worst part about my erratic, late-night hours: less time with my man. We used to eat dinner together every night; now it's hit and miss, depending on when I get home, if I want a workout, how hungry he is, all these things. To help alleviate a little of this, we come back to Wednesdays and the biggest reason they rock: I make a nice dinner and we sit down together and enjoy some "us" time.
Often, it's just chilling in front of the TV, chatting about random things, but that's the kind of stuff that makes our relationship work so well - we can completely relax with one another and just enjoy being lazy together.
Tonight I'm making pork chops with a curry-apple sauce, roasted asparagus and basmati rice. I picked up a sample pack of beer today and we're going to have a lovely evening.
This is why Wednesdays rock.
Wednesdays are THE day...
...when I'm going to start updating everything, if only because that's the day I have time to do things.
I'm going to start weighing in on Wednesdays (starting today - I'll post that later!) and I'm also going to be doing student loan repayment updates on Wednesdays.
I've been finding that, without even trying, my days are just so busy. I know there are so many people out there with so much more on the go than me, but I'm still struggling to find that happy balance of work and life. Right now, it feels like all work.
On the plus side, I've got some time off coming up. I'm off this Friday and Monday/Tuesday of next week - woo hoo! I plan to cross some things off my to-do list - but I also plan to put "do nothing" on my to-do list!
And since it's Wednesday it's my turn to make a nice dinner for the Beau and I. Tonight is tilapia with Parmesan polenta and sauteed veg. YUM.
I'm going to start weighing in on Wednesdays (starting today - I'll post that later!) and I'm also going to be doing student loan repayment updates on Wednesdays.
I've been finding that, without even trying, my days are just so busy. I know there are so many people out there with so much more on the go than me, but I'm still struggling to find that happy balance of work and life. Right now, it feels like all work.
On the plus side, I've got some time off coming up. I'm off this Friday and Monday/Tuesday of next week - woo hoo! I plan to cross some things off my to-do list - but I also plan to put "do nothing" on my to-do list!
And since it's Wednesday it's my turn to make a nice dinner for the Beau and I. Tonight is tilapia with Parmesan polenta and sauteed veg. YUM.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Up-Down Challenge Weihg-in #12 - delayed!
I know it's Thursday but I did weigh myself on Sunday. It's just I've been SO busy with work that I haven't had time to even think about blogging, let alone put words to screen. To put it in perspective: I saw the Beau Sunday night; I did not see him awake again until he got home from work yesterday (i.e. Wednesday). Royal wedding + federal election + dead terrorist = busy times at work.
But that is all behind me, which is good because I need to get back on track with the exercising. My weigh-in wasn't great: 194 lb, which is up 2 lb. I'm getting a little fed up with losing and gaining the same 2-3 pounds so I'm really going to buckle down now. I find that when I get in the habit of running 3x a week my body responds rather nicely and I look good but more importantly I feel good. That's what i want to strive for because I like feeling good. And I've pretty much sworn off heels (which makes me so sad - have you SEEN the amazing wedge sandals out there this spring?!) which I think has really helped my legs to not hurt as much during/after my runs.
I think I'm still a bit away from a 5K though; my lungs can't seem to keep up - yet.
With any luck, I can get out of work soon too (still here at 6pm) because this girl wants a run!
But that is all behind me, which is good because I need to get back on track with the exercising. My weigh-in wasn't great: 194 lb, which is up 2 lb. I'm getting a little fed up with losing and gaining the same 2-3 pounds so I'm really going to buckle down now. I find that when I get in the habit of running 3x a week my body responds rather nicely and I look good but more importantly I feel good. That's what i want to strive for because I like feeling good. And I've pretty much sworn off heels (which makes me so sad - have you SEEN the amazing wedge sandals out there this spring?!) which I think has really helped my legs to not hurt as much during/after my runs.
I think I'm still a bit away from a 5K though; my lungs can't seem to keep up - yet.
With any luck, I can get out of work soon too (still here at 6pm) because this girl wants a run!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
It is Sunday
And I am at work. Sigh.
The Royal Wedding is done and once the election is over, my work life should return to some variety of normal.
On the plus side, I did something pretty awesome yesterday:
I PAID OFF THE LAST OF MY CONSUMER DEBT!
That's right, this girl is consumer debt-free! It was rather anti-climactic, I must say; I just punched in a few number and selected the proper account and the magic of online banking wiped my debt away.
It won't really sink in until tomorrow, when the banks open and the transaction goes through, but when it does I will gaze lovingly at the big, round $0.00 balance sitting there.
Now on to those student loans!
The Royal Wedding is done and once the election is over, my work life should return to some variety of normal.
On the plus side, I did something pretty awesome yesterday:
I PAID OFF THE LAST OF MY CONSUMER DEBT!
That's right, this girl is consumer debt-free! It was rather anti-climactic, I must say; I just punched in a few number and selected the proper account and the magic of online banking wiped my debt away.
It won't really sink in until tomorrow, when the banks open and the transaction goes through, but when it does I will gaze lovingly at the big, round $0.00 balance sitting there.
Now on to those student loans!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Up-Down Challenge Weigh-in #9
I weighed myself last night, but got home so late that I've only found time now to do an update.
To be honest, I was scared to get on the scale because I haven't been following any kind of sensible eating plan. There's been beer and wine, sweets and burgers and not nearly enough exercise.
So imagine my surprise when I stepped on the scale to see...193.0 lbs.
That's a loss of 2.6 lbs from last week! How the hell...?
To be honest, I'm not completely sure how I ended up losing this week, but I have a couple of ideas:
1 - Since starting on Maclean's, I've started eating more throughout the day because my hours are so erratic and I often don't end up going for lunch until around 4:00. But since I start work around 10:00, that's a long time to go between breakfast and lunch, so I'm snacking. I've discovered these awesome Fibre 1 bars that are only 100 calories, are full of fibre and have dark chocolate in them, so they fill me up, make me poop and satisfy my sweet tooth all at once. (Figuratively speaking, of course.) I'm also snacking on apples and almonds between lunch and dinner too.
2 - The other reason also has to do with Maclean's, but isn't quite as good as healthy snacking. I may be losing weight due to stress, as I've been very stressed about work since starting. I've dreamed that I've been fired and I've woken up many nights thinking that I was late for work and that pages were late and all sorts of things. I really don't want this to be the reason I'm losing because I want to move beyond being stressed all the time. I guess only time will tell.
In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy my 2.6 lb weight loss!
To be honest, I was scared to get on the scale because I haven't been following any kind of sensible eating plan. There's been beer and wine, sweets and burgers and not nearly enough exercise.
So imagine my surprise when I stepped on the scale to see...193.0 lbs.
That's a loss of 2.6 lbs from last week! How the hell...?
To be honest, I'm not completely sure how I ended up losing this week, but I have a couple of ideas:
1 - Since starting on Maclean's, I've started eating more throughout the day because my hours are so erratic and I often don't end up going for lunch until around 4:00. But since I start work around 10:00, that's a long time to go between breakfast and lunch, so I'm snacking. I've discovered these awesome Fibre 1 bars that are only 100 calories, are full of fibre and have dark chocolate in them, so they fill me up, make me poop and satisfy my sweet tooth all at once. (Figuratively speaking, of course.) I'm also snacking on apples and almonds between lunch and dinner too.
2 - The other reason also has to do with Maclean's, but isn't quite as good as healthy snacking. I may be losing weight due to stress, as I've been very stressed about work since starting. I've dreamed that I've been fired and I've woken up many nights thinking that I was late for work and that pages were late and all sorts of things. I really don't want this to be the reason I'm losing because I want to move beyond being stressed all the time. I guess only time will tell.
In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy my 2.6 lb weight loss!
Friday, April 1, 2011
So you had a bad day...
Today was a rough day at work. I made a few mistakes. I pissed some people off. I did a few things wrong.
The worst part? Beating myself up about it and almost convincing myself that I can't do this job.
It took a few hours of morosely wandering around the mall in a failed bout of retail therapy before I finally began listening to that wee voice in the dark recesses of my mind saying, "It's okay. You made mistakes, you'll learn from them, don't dwell on it. Enjoy the weekend and be amazing-er on Monday."
So that's what I'm going to do. That wee voice can be so wise sometimes.
The worst part? Beating myself up about it and almost convincing myself that I can't do this job.
It took a few hours of morosely wandering around the mall in a failed bout of retail therapy before I finally began listening to that wee voice in the dark recesses of my mind saying, "It's okay. You made mistakes, you'll learn from them, don't dwell on it. Enjoy the weekend and be amazing-er on Monday."
So that's what I'm going to do. That wee voice can be so wise sometimes.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Desserts spelled backwards is stressed
My foul mood from last night is finally starting to abate. I know I'm in the midst of a setback and that I can't let it discourage me. And I've been getting some wonderful encouragement from the Beau and from a wonderful woman he introduced into my life (which helps further affirm I'm with the right man) and that has helped me.
But today, after having a near meltdown at the doctor's office after waiting over an hour for my appointment and then rescheduling and walking out in a huff, I think I've figured out what's causing my grief: I'm stressed.
As I mentioned earlier, I'm starting a new job on March 23, with Maclean's, and this is a dream job for me. But I'm not stressed about Maclean's; I'm stressed about training the people who will replace me and making sure they are properly informed and comfortable with their new responsibilities before I go. Oh, and I've got to put out one more issue of Flare, a special supplement for Flare, various supplements for Connected and an issue of Connected for Business. All in the next two weeks, of course.
Fuck.
I've read that stress can make you gain weight for various reasons and I'm beginning to think that's what's going on with me (despite thinking previously that I was immune to the health-wrecking affects of stress). I'm not sleeping as well as I should be; my stomach always seems to be rumbling, even after I eat; I feel anxious and overwhelmed; and I'm more than a little on edge when I have no reason to be.
I'm fortunate that my new job will keep me not just within the same company, but also on the same floor so I'll be very nearby should my replacements need assistance. But I also know I'll be busy learning my new role and I want to make sure I leave them with as much as I can so we're not running back and forth to each other, trying to figure things out.
I just have to keep reminding myself that all I can do is take it a day at a time and do the best I can between now and when I move on. And that eating right and exercise are GREAT ways to combat stress and - whaddaya know? - are also great ways to get healthy and lose weight.
All right wagon, I'm back on you. Let's try this again!
But today, after having a near meltdown at the doctor's office after waiting over an hour for my appointment and then rescheduling and walking out in a huff, I think I've figured out what's causing my grief: I'm stressed.
As I mentioned earlier, I'm starting a new job on March 23, with Maclean's, and this is a dream job for me. But I'm not stressed about Maclean's; I'm stressed about training the people who will replace me and making sure they are properly informed and comfortable with their new responsibilities before I go. Oh, and I've got to put out one more issue of Flare, a special supplement for Flare, various supplements for Connected and an issue of Connected for Business. All in the next two weeks, of course.
Fuck.
I've read that stress can make you gain weight for various reasons and I'm beginning to think that's what's going on with me (despite thinking previously that I was immune to the health-wrecking affects of stress). I'm not sleeping as well as I should be; my stomach always seems to be rumbling, even after I eat; I feel anxious and overwhelmed; and I'm more than a little on edge when I have no reason to be.
I'm fortunate that my new job will keep me not just within the same company, but also on the same floor so I'll be very nearby should my replacements need assistance. But I also know I'll be busy learning my new role and I want to make sure I leave them with as much as I can so we're not running back and forth to each other, trying to figure things out.
I just have to keep reminding myself that all I can do is take it a day at a time and do the best I can between now and when I move on. And that eating right and exercise are GREAT ways to combat stress and - whaddaya know? - are also great ways to get healthy and lose weight.
All right wagon, I'm back on you. Let's try this again!
Thursday, March 3, 2011
The big news
Hey, I never shared my big news, did I?
Well, if you know me in the Facebookiverse, you already know, but I'll share again: I've got a new job!
And not just any new job, I'm going to be working on a weekly magazine. And not just any magazine, but one of two weekly magazines that I've always wanted to work on. I'm going to Maclean's!
(The other magazine is The Hockey News. How nerdy am I?)
My official title is Production Editor - but don't be fooled by the "editor" part. I'm not actually writing anything, but I'll be working with the editorial department to do schedules and flatplans and keep the edit side on schedule and get the pages to the printer on time. I'm incredibly excited but it hasn't really sunk in yet, mainly because I still have to put out one more issue of Flare, train my replacement on Flare, put out another issue of Connected for Business, train my replacement on the Connected account and tie up all kinds of loose ends between now and March 22.
Phew.
But it will be worth it and I CAN'T WAIT!
Well, if you know me in the Facebookiverse, you already know, but I'll share again: I've got a new job!
And not just any new job, I'm going to be working on a weekly magazine. And not just any magazine, but one of two weekly magazines that I've always wanted to work on. I'm going to Maclean's!
(The other magazine is The Hockey News. How nerdy am I?)
My official title is Production Editor - but don't be fooled by the "editor" part. I'm not actually writing anything, but I'll be working with the editorial department to do schedules and flatplans and keep the edit side on schedule and get the pages to the printer on time. I'm incredibly excited but it hasn't really sunk in yet, mainly because I still have to put out one more issue of Flare, train my replacement on Flare, put out another issue of Connected for Business, train my replacement on the Connected account and tie up all kinds of loose ends between now and March 22.
Phew.
But it will be worth it and I CAN'T WAIT!
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