Three weeks in

Tomorrow is my fourth WW weigh-in but marks three full weeks that I've been on the program. So far, I've had great success, logging losses at each weigh-in. Last week I was a little nervous that a weekend of indulging would throw me off my progress, but I prevailed and still lost.

I'm not so optimistic about tomorrow.

I had another great Saturday night this past weekend and did a significant amount of damage to my points totals. As it stands tonight, I've burned through my extra 49 weekly points an dipped into my activity points, using seven of the 17 I've earned. I know this is what you're supposed to do, that it's okay to use up the points because you can't carry them over and it helps keep you from feeling deprived. Well, I certainly haven't felt deprived this week!

So I'm going into tomorrow with trepidation and I don't know what would be worse: gaining, losing or staying pat. Why would losing be bad? Because that would help emphasize that my indulging is okay, that I can do it and still lose weight. And this would be bad because it would feel like I'm reverting to old habits and that it's far too early in the program to do that. Gaining would be bad because, well, it's gaining. Staying pat would be the least bad of the three; at least I wouldn't have undone any of my progress!

I'll be honest, I'm still struggling with my food relationships. I want to eat when I'm not hungry, but because I'm bored. I'm trying to keep my fruit and veggie intake high but I'm starting to get tired of it. I also have problems listening to my body for "I'm full!" cues; I love food and I love to keep eating delicious things even when I'm more than satiated.

But it's only been three weeks and these are the things that Weight Watchers will help me with (right?). I've said before I'm not the most patient person so there's a part of me that wants to be 30 lb lighter NOW because haven't I eaten enough salad yet? I just have to keep reminding myself that I'll get there, that baby steps are where it's at, and that I'm in this with my body, not against it.