You know what's great about Christmas? Presents. You know what's not so great about Christmas? Coming up with the list of presents I want. It's not like I'm seven any more and all I want are Barbies and He-Man figures. And since my parents are divorced, I have to come up with two exclusive lists, one for each. The tough part is that the things I want as an almost-30-year-old are not easily broken down into the kind of things my parents like to gift.
I had Snake Mountain as a kid; isn't it great?
What I would like is a lump-sum, pay-it-all-off payment made to my student loans; a trip somewhere warm and sunny and food-and-drink-laden; my own swanky condo; or even just the winning lottery numbers. Thing is, my folks like getting me stuff I can open on Christmas morning (as most folks do) but I really don't need any more books or socks or tea towels or sweaters or movies. They're both loath to the idea of just giving money (fair enough) but, in a perfect world, I would get a whole whack of gift cards. Indigo, the LCBO, Shopper's; with gift cards for these places, I could try the expensive shampoo without breaking my own budget or buy a variety of beer just because or wait until the book I REALLY want is released.
I figure the easiest way to train them in this way of gift-giving is to have a baby. That way, they can be all goopy towards the kid and have someone to rip open all those gifts on Christmas morning and just give Momma (i.e. me) gift cards because they can't be bothered to think of what to get me when there are toys and tiny outfits to be bought.
I think it's a brilliant plan.
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